


maybe i just wanna be yours

by charliejones4505



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Band, Bottom Louis, Depression, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Harry takes a while to come around, Love at First Sight, M/M, Musician Harry, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Recreational Drug Use, Rockstar Harry, Strangers to Lovers, Top Harry, White Eskimo, are in the band, but nothing triggering, for Harry, for Louis, idk how long this will be, if there is, niall is just niall, nick and harry have a fwb thing, nick/harry is only mentioned a bit, no smut between them, only a little bit though, there will be a tw, zayn harry and gemma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:08:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28318746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charliejones4505/pseuds/charliejones4505
Summary: green had met blue, and it felt like time had stopped, and it wasn’t just green and blue, it was all the colours crashing together in perfect harmony, uniting  them togetherORthe one in which Harry Styles is a wanna be rockstar in a band with Zayn and GemmaAnd Louis just wants to get with Harry even though he thinks Harrys dating Gemma!!ON HOLD!!
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik/Liam Payne
Kudos: 6





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> yes okay i’m starting another fanfic that i probably won’t finish...but who cares, this is the longest chapter i’ve ever written, sooo i hope you enjoy and new fic wooo

Louis was bored. No he was more than bored, he felt like dying might be a better option. He might be slightly over exaggerating, but no one needed to know that. He was currently pacing round his flat, completely ignoring the mess that surrounded him, cleaning up would be something to do, but where was the fun in that? As if on cue, Niall burst into Louis’ flat with Liam trailing behind him like a lost puppy. “LOUIS I COME BEARING NEWS” Niall bellowed as he slammed the door behind Liam. Louis raised an eyebrow, trying hard to conceal his excitement of finally being able to do something and get out of the house. “Do you remember my mate Zayn from art class” Niall questioned, whilst going into the fridge, attempting to get food from it but slowly backed away ashe looked inside. “Yeah I think so.” Louis replied, eager to see where this would go. “Well him and his band have got a gig tonight, they’re only small, but i’ve got three tickets so i thought me you and Liam over here could go, especially as he seems to be particularly interested in a certain Zayn Malik ay li? Niall smirked and nudged Liam, as he turned a bright red. Louis thought it over inabout 0.2 seconds and immediately nodded his head in agreement, a beaming smile taking over his face. “So who’s actually in this band then?” Louis questioned hoping to know somebody. “Well there’s Zayn obviously, he’s on guitar, then there’s Harry Styles, he’s the singer and guitarist, and then there’s this girl called Gemma on drums, who doesn’t actually go to uni with the rest of them, but she’s still in the band.” Louis deflated slightly at the names, he knew no one, apart from Zayn who Niall had mentioned about three times. “Right okay, when and where, and then i want you to leave so i can get ready” Louis stood up and then fell down again as he slipped on a t-shirt that was left on the floor of his kitchen. After they agreed everything Niall and Liam left, leaving Louis by himself, stood pondering what to wear, he spent probably longer than necessary in deciding on a white collared shirt with a dark blue button down over the top, with red jeans and suspenders, and his TOMS which he never lefthome without. He grabbed his phone and keys, and left the house to meet Niall and Liam.

The venue was run down, and outside for the most part, but that didn’t deter Louis, Liam or Niall, as they made their way to the front of the pit, Niall was right, they were only a very small band, but Louis just wanted somewhere to go, and this was perfect. The lights went down and the band walked on stage, Louis had a direct view of the lead singer, whoever Harry Styles was, well Louis was just about to find out. As the lights went up and the first chord of the guitar was played, Louis felt temporarily blinded, and as cliche as it sounded, it wasn’t from the stage lights, but from Harry Styles, his hair was messily strewn across his face and he was putting all his effort into the notes he was singing and the chords he was playing on the guitar. Louis had absolutely no idea what the song was, but that didn’t take away from how beautiful it was, how beautiful he was. Louis never believed in love at first sight but he thinks his opinion may have changed, Harry opened his eyes, and he scanned the crowed, his eyes landed on Louis, and Louis’ breath hitched, green had met blue, and it felt like time had stopped, and it wasn’t just green and blue, it was all the colours crashing together in perfect harmony, unitingthem together, Louis couldn’t look away, and when Harry averted his eyes, Louis felt his cheeks warm up. The song then finished, and Harry spoke into the microphone “Hello We’re White Eskimo, thank you for coming our next song is called To Be So Lonely, I hope you enjoy” Louis didn’t know a voice could sound that nice, the way the syllables rolled off of Harry’s tongue it made it sound like gold melting off of him, Harry put his guitar away for this next song and just felt the song, Louis never knew he could be in awe of one person, the sun had started to set behind Harry creating a medley of colours that looked like Louis insides, soft a melting, all because of one curly haired green eyed man.

After the gig, Louis couldn’t take his eyes off of where Harry once stood, until Niall slapped his back and slowly dragged him away, blissfully unaware of how Louis had changed that night, and how Harry would forever be painted on Louis mind, just like the sky behind Harry as he performed.

And as Louis was asleep he dreamt of a curly haired green eyed man.

The next day, Louis approached Niall, and questioned him further on what he knew about white eskimo. “To be honest not much mate” He replied, “All i know is that Zayns really nice and i’m pretty sure Harry and Gemma are shagging, not one hundred percent sure on that though, everyone just says they’re really close and that explains why she’s in the band but doesn’t go to uni with us.” Louis sat there shocked, it never even crossed his mind that Harry wouldn’t be gay, he supposed that was probably his issue, but he wouldn’t accept that, but Harry being in a relationship, okay that made sense to Louis as Harry was extremely attractive. But a girlfriend, Louis was beyond shocked.

When he got home he was ashamed to say he immediately went onto instagram and searched for the man that had caught his attention last night, and his heart dropped, when his instagram was just him, Zayn and Gemma, who Harry even had a nickname for, it was hilarious really, how Louis was becoming attached and jealous to a man that doesn’t even know he exists. That’s when Louis did something irrational, he decided that messaging Harry would be the perfect way to introduce himself, Louis was terrified for his response, and fell asleep with his phone clutched in his hand, hoping for a response. But as usual he fell asleep too early. And Harry replied after.

When Louis woke up the next morning he squealed as he saw a message from Harry. It was short and blunt but Louis was happy nonetheless. He went to school with a smile on his face, and if that was because of Harry, well then no one needed to know.

Louis practically begged Niall to find out when white eskimo were performing again, and when he found out he dragged Niall and Liam along, and Liam was more than willing as he had his eye on Zayn. Louis was in awe once again of the way Harry commanded the stage, it’s like he was born to be up there, and being on stage and performing was his home. However Louis didn’t miss the looks that Harry and Gemma constantly gave eachother, it was different, they obviously meant something to eachother, and Louis kicked himself for not realising something was different between the two of them, he felt stupid. Did that make him give up? Absolutely not, Louis Tomlinson loves a challenge. Harry Styles is the biggest challenge of them all. 

When Louis got home he washed all thoughts of Harry from his mind, and just watched films by himself, that was of course until his phone buzzed with a message from Harry, which made Louis shoot up from the sofa. It was simple and sweet but it made Louis’ insides twist inside him as he contemplated what to reply, in the end he settled for something basic, but extremely Louis’ and hoped that Harry wouldn’t find it too risky. He’d sent it already, he couldn’t take it back, and he felt his heart beating out of his chest, until Harry didn’t reply. Louis was okay with that, really he was, he wasn’t blinking back tears over a boy he had met 2 days ago, honestly he wasn’t. For some reason though Louis thought Harry was worth it.

Louis woke up to the sunlight assaulting his eyelids, which was weird as he didn’t realise that he had left them closed when he went to bed, no he definitely did? he shot up out of bed, and and saw Niall sat on the floor by his bed eating from a box of cereal. Niall turned around to face Louis “oh you’re up good.” he said with a smile and a mouth full of cereal. “Why are you here” Louis said with his eyebrow raised. “You remember Harry, Zayn and Gemma you know from white eskimo” Louis eyes lit up at the mention of Harry but they dulled again at the mention of Gemma who Louis was convinced now Harry was dating. “Yeah?” he sighed, trying not to get his hopes up. “Well” Niall continued “they’ve invited me you and Liam to meet up with them for lunch. Louis immediately jumped out of bed and started running around searching for clothes, looking for anything that he believes might impress Harry. He finally decided on a plain white shirt and some grey braces with some black jeans. He styled his hair, and finally looked atNiall, who was rolling on the floor laughing “What?” Louis asked immediately looking in the mirror checking if there was something on his face. “Nothing” Niall said finally able tocontrol his laughter.

They both left Louis flat, planning to meet Liam and the other boys at the cafe.

Louis felt like his mouth dropped open and his eyes bugged out of his head at the sight of Harry. He was wearing a shirt with plants on it and black jeans with a singe rip in the knee with sunglasses on his face, and tan chelsea boots on his feet. Louis thought, that in his own way, Harry Styles was beauty, there’s no words in the english language to describe how ethereal Harry was. Louis was shaken out of his trance as Harry came over to him and Niall with a smile on his face and an outstretched hand, “Hi” he said “I’m Harry, you must be Niall and Louis?” Louis felt his mouth go dry at the slow drawl of his speaking voice, it was almost as melodic as his singing voice, everything about Harry left Louis in awe.

Suddenly Liam and Zayn came over and Zayn and Harry did one of those stupidly masculine “bro hugs” that made Louis want to inject his femininity into all of the male species. Harry said that “Gems can’t come shes not feeling too good” Just Harry give her a nickname, and the way “Gems” rolled of his tongue made him want to vomit and then punch Gemma in the face, because how can someone like Harry be straight?! Okay Louis admits he might be being a bit offensive and he’s never met Gemma so he can’t exactly be mean to her without having a conversation with her... But he finds Harry enthralling, he can’t keep his eyes off him, when they sit in the cafe, Harry is sat opposite Louis, and he just can’t stop staring at him, his green eyes making him dizzy and in a daze that he can’t even explain. Harrys laugh. It takes over his body, it entraps everyone in the room, everyone is staring at him whenever he speaks, he traps everyone whoever they are.

When Louis finally gets home, his heart is full of Harry, and Harry doesn’t even realise. He doesn’t realise how much he means to Louis, after seeing eachother properly once and not properly twice.

Louis is already entranced by Harry Styles.

And Harry doesn’t even know.


	2. two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! this chapter is slightly shorter but i wanted you to be able to see how this book will be written (which is one chapter from louis pov and one from harrys, but both depicting the same events) 
> 
> I need help on what you think Harry,Louis,Liam,Niall and Zayn should be studying at uni? so if you have any ideas let me know thank you !! :) 
> 
> as always comments are appreciated, either positive or negative as it helps me improve my writing, thank you :)

Harry never feels more alive than when he’s on stage. He could be having the worst day in the world, but as soo as he steps on stage, he feels his shoulders come down and his body unwind and he gets completely lost in the music, he always scans the crowd looking for someone that will hold his focus. That’s when he sees him. Louis. People always say that opposites attract, and Harry felt that instant magnetic pull towards Louis. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of him, he couldn’t see his full beauty, but what he could see, took his breath away. Harry averted his gaze and turned around to his sister Gemma and in the instrumental section mouthed “in front of me” and Gemma looked in Louis direction and looked back at Harry and winked at him, his face broke out into a huge grin at the small seal of approval from Gemma of Louis. 

Gemma means everything g to Harry, they have always been inseparable, even though they were six years apart, Harry being nineteen and Gemma being twenty five, they would never leave each other, they never have and they never will, they find it hilarious when people believe that they are a couple, they love each other, of course they do, but it is never anything more than a relationship between siblings. They agree that it can be as they are best friends as well as siblings, and they live together after Gemma had a difficult breakup and Harry was the only person there for her. Which further strengthened their bond, but also the rumours of them dating. 

“Gemma!” Harry yelled as he bought in bags and bags of shopping. He wasn’t shocked when Zayn walked in and started helping him unpack everything, Zayn was always around his and Gemmas flat. “How was classes today” Zayn asked to make conversation, even though Harry could sense he had something different on his mind. “Fucking tiring” Harry laughed “Mr Cowell was a dick as usual” Zayn hummed in understanding, before turning to face Harry, his body completely towards him, forgetting the shopping entirely. “Do you remember me telling you about Niall Horan from my lessons?” He asked, Harry thought for a moment before nodding “Well i’ve asked him and a few friends out for lunch tomorrow if you want to come with Gemma?” Harry agreed knowing how much Gemma loved to meet new people and continued to put away the shopping. 

Harry, Gemma and Zayn were stood backstage and waiting to go on, when Gemma whispered in Harrys ear that she wasn’t feeling very good, Harry furrowed his brows and pinched his lip between his fingers, before they were being called on stage, he turned and hugged Gemma and high-fived Zayn before plastering a smile on his face and putting his guitar over his body before running out onto the stage. During the performance he was constantly looking back at Gemma. He noticed the boy from the previous night, however he was too concerned for his sister and how she was feeling to linger on him for too long. He didn’t feel fully engrossed in the performance like he usually did, the worry almost blinding him, he was sure Gemma would be fine, but his instinct to protect and help his sister kicked in. However the crowed still seemed to be enjoying the performance nonetheless. 

The next day he woke up to Gemma groaning in pain and immediately knew that she would be unable to go to lunch with everyone, he looked at the clock and saw that it was only three in the morning, he went to Gemmas room and stayed with her until she was finally able to go to sleep at around eleven in the morning. He put some paracetamol by her bed along with a glass of water and a note explaining where he had gone, and he rushed to get ready as he had spent too much time looking after Gemma. Not that Harry minded of course. He pushed some sunglasses on his eyes, in order to conceal the bags that decorated them, he grabbed his car keys and phone and he left the flat. 

When he arrived he saw two people who Zayn had described as Louis and Niall. Harry immediately recognised Louis as the boy from the concert and he smiled as he approached the duo, he held out his hand as he introduced himself. When Zayn and Liam arrived, Harry explained mainly to Zayn that Gemma could not come due to being ill, he noticed a scowl overtake Louis face, but he shrugged it off as the all went inside the cafe. 

Harry got on really well with Niall, and he felt his cheeks hurt from laughing so much at his funny stories and general funny personality. Harry noticed that Louis didn’t say much and tried to smile at him and involve him in the conversations that him and Niall were having however Louis seemed to be in a trance staring at Harry, however Harry once again shrugged it off, not for one minute believing that Louis could be attracted to him. 

Harry had also noticed that Zayn and Liam looked more like they were on a date than hanging around with everyone as friends, Harry mentioned this to Niall, who beamed at him, and explained that Liam never shuts up about Zayn. Harry felt bad as Zayn was his best friend at told him everything, however he had mentioned Liams name, possibly twice, maybe even less. By the end of the lunch with everyone, Harry had swapped numbers with Niall and promises to let him know if Zayn even mentions anything about Liam and Niall promises to let Harry know if Liam says anything about what he has now dubbed “Mission Ziam”. When he said goodbye to Louis he noticed Louis staring at him for probably an uncomfortable amount of time before he left, but Harry had found that he didn’t seem to mind as much as he thought he would. 

When Harry went to bed that night, Harrys thoughts weren’t about Louis, he was so exhausted that he fell into a dreamless sleep whilst Louis mind was filled with green eyes, Harry’s mind was just darkness that he had finally succumbed to.


	3. three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey this is the longest chapter yet aha
> 
> thank you to everyone who has left kudos so far, and i hope you enjoy the chapter! 
> 
> feel free to leave comments and kudos 
> 
> thank you ! :)

Louis feels an array of emotions bubbling in his stomach whenever he thinks of Harry Styles. He feels hope that maybe one day Harry will love him, but that is immediately overshadowed by the guilt that he feels whenever he thinks about Harry and Gemma. Louis would never want to be the the person that splits up a relationship, and Louis saw how they looked at each other, they were obviously in love, and Louis was rendered powerless against that, and he would never want to be the home-wrecker that tore Harry and Gemma apart. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he did that. However in the back of his mind Louis knew that he would never be able to stop thinking about Harry 

When Louis walked into his flat, he wasn’t surprised to see Niall spread across his sofa. He gave Niall his own key a few months ago, even though he didn’t live there, and the irishman had been abusing his key ever since, and was probably there more than Louis. Niall was ok the phone and cackling loudly, which wasn’t out of character for the blonde male, Louis started wandering round the flat as Niall mumbled incoherently into his phone, and once he had ended the call, Louis stood in front of him with one eyebrow raised and his hands on his hips. “Who were you talking to Niall?” Louis asks with a small pout on his face, okay he could admit that he could be a bit of a drama queen sometimes. But only sometimes.Besides it was his flat, and he deserves attention. Okay maybe he was a drama queen a little bit more than sometimes. Niall arched his brow in return to Louis question and a small smirk was placed on his face. “Why does it matter to you?” Louis scoffed at Niall's retort, but then realised he had no suitable comeback “because I want to know” Louis pouted further opting to go for sympathy over sass. Niall laughed “it was just Harry, it wasn’t that special.” “Harry Styles?” Louis pushed Niall for an answer “Yeah” Niall shrugged not finding it that important. Louis mouth went dry. When did Niall and Harry become so close? From what he remembered him and Harry weren’t that close at the cafe? Of course Louis spent all his time staring at Harry and he wasn’t really paying attention to what was coming out of his lips, to be honest he was just staring at his lips.

Louis was snapped out of his Harry induced trance by Niall waving his hand in front of his face. Louis slowly blinked back to reality. Niall had concern written all over his face. “Lou?” Niall asked softly, “are you okay? you blanked on me there mate?” Louis smiled softly at Niall, “Yeah i was just thinking about something.” “Someone more like” Niall mumbled under his breath “what?” Louis asked. “Nothing” Niall said, not looking entirely convinced at Louis explanation however he didn’t press it. “Anyway” Niall continued “Harry and Zayn are going out clubbing tonight and have asked if me, you and Liam want to come with them?” “Where are they going?” Louis asked secretly excited to spend more time with Harry. “Red Star” Louis eyes widened in shock. Red Star was one of the most elite clubs in London. “How can they get into there?” Niall shrugged “Harry said he knew people, he didn’t say who though.” Louis knew Harry was quite popular, he could tell that from the large volume of followers he has on instagram.

Once Niall had left and gone back to his own place to get changed for tonight, Louis decided to some some more instagram stalking and looked at who followed Harry. He was shocked once again when he saw that Nick Grimshaw followed him. Of course Louis knew who Nick Grimshaw was, he was a radio host of the biggest radio station in England, and one that Louis is constantly listening to whenever he’s doing anything. If Louis got the chance to meet Nick Grimshaw through Harry, he might pass out. Louis then mindlessly scrolled through Nicks instagram hoping to find something that links him to Harry, when he bolted up right in his bed. On Nick Grimshaws instagram was a photo of him and Harry on a night out.

Louis had to rub his eyes to check that what he saw was real. Harry and Nick. Louis weird childhood crush that made him realise he was gay, and his current crush that made him realise he was very very very much gay. He wasn’t sure that he would be able to handle being in the same club as both of them. However Louis would absolutely not pass up the opportunity to go to Red Star. He then started panicking. What would he wear? What would Harry like? Him being female, Louis thought to himself, but he pushed that thought out of his mind pretty quickly. He wasn’t going to get himself upset tonight, not when he has the opportunity to go clubbing with Harry Styles of all people, at Red Star of all places.

As he was getting dressed, Louis king started wondering, Niall had never mentioned that Gemma was coming, it had been a week, surely Gemma would not still be feeling ill would she? Louis was praying that she wouldn’t be there, he was determined to talk to Harry tonight and get to know him better. Louis had decided to wear his best red jeans and a striped t-shirt, with his signature TOMS on his feet.

Just as Louis was styling his hair, his phone buzzed from his bed, he went over and saw a text from Niall saying that they were having pre-drinks at Harry’s flat, which made excitement bubble in Louis’ stomach, he checked his hair for the last time before he called an uber and made his way to Harry’s flat.

As Louis entered the building to get into the lift to Harry’s flat, he was wondering if Harry was extremely rich. He knocked on the door, and Harry opened the door, and Louis breath hitched, Harry was wearing black jeans and a light blue shirt that was pretty much unbuttoned, leaving Harrys tattooed torso on display, he had paired it with a black shit jacked and a silver cross necklace, which Louis found extremely ironic considering the outfit he was currently wearing.

Harry smiled and let Louis into his flat. Louis looked around at the modern but obviously expensive flat.

“A-am i the first one here?” Louis managed to say, only stuttering slightly, “Oh yeah” Harry smiled, “Liam and Zayn will be meeting us at the club and Nialls always late as you probably know.” He did. “And Nicks probably stood downstairs waiting to be fashionably late.” Louis tensed slightly at Nicks name, out of fear or excitement, Louis isn’t quite sure. Harry notices Louis tensing. “Oh i’m sorry i didn’t ask if he could come, he’s really nice though, I promise.” Harry beams at Louis, his dimple popping out, and Louis thinks that he can feel his heart melting at Harry and his dimples. The room has gone quiet and Harry and Louis were staring at each other in comfortable silence. Harry’s doorbell rings and he looks away, Louis feels his cheeks heat up and turn a dusty pink colour. Louis heard Harry and another Loud voice , Louis presumed that it was Niall, but when Harry walks through with Nick Grimshaw walking behind him, Louis feels his jaw drop to the floor, the two most attractive people (in Louis opinion) were stood side by side and laughing, Louis managed to pick his jaw up from the floor and stuttering out a “Hi” and raising a shaking hand towards Nick. He smiles in his direction and shakes Louis’ hand, and feels his body relax at the friendly nature of Nick and they introduce themselves to each other as Harry lets Niall in with his cackling laughter ringing through the flat. Once Niall is in the living room with Louis and Nick, Harry goes and gets everyone drinks and when Louis tries the cocktail and he is pretty sure it is ninety-nine percent alcohol. Louis eyes dart around the rooms and he noticed that no-one minded the drink, so he continues to slowly sip at it, not wanting to seem out of place,it he is not one for alcohol, and he doesn’t want to make a fool out of himself infront of his celebrity crush, and his actual crush. Louis was determined to that would not happen. After Harry, Niall and Nick have had multiple of Harry’s “special” cocktails as Niall has now named it, they finally called an uber and made their way to the club.

Louis was was quite excited in going to one of the nicest clubs in London. Louis started to think he might be underdressed, but it wasn’t like he could go and get changed now. He relaxed back into his seat . As they pulled up to the club Louis was bouncing in his seat in excitement, Niall patted his shoulder, he too was excited however he was better and hiding it that Louis was. Nick and Harry stepped out of the car first and waited for Niall and Louis to follow behind them. They sawmassive queue and Louis was worried that they would have to stand in it; however he was taken aback when Harry walks over and hugs the bouncer and Nick follows and he ushers the four of them inside, patting Nick and Harry on the back as they walk straight into the club, completely passing the line, making Louis extremely happy.

When they got in there, Harry told Niall and Louis that Zayn and Liam couldn’t come. Louis nodded and then noticed a look that Harry and Niall shared before laughing, Louis was confused however he brushed it off and looked around the club, and taking in as much as possible as he knew he would most likely never come back here again unless he clings onto Harry as much as possible, which he will likely try to. Harry and Nick led Niall and Louis through the club until they came to a slightly secluded corner, with a round table and high bar stools with a reserved sign on it, the more Louis got to know Harry, the more he wondered how famous Harry actually was, as he seemed to be watched wherever he went, and had lots of connections. Louis didn’t dwell on it for too long, as he was focused on having fun, and letting himself go, he had been too stressed with uni and his thoughts of Harry.

Louis was handed a shot of something and Harry was smirking at him, and all four of them smashed their shots together and throwing them back, before slamming them on the tall table. Louis felt the liquid slide down his throat and the familiar burn thattravelled from his mouth to his stomach making him already slightly buzzed, he had to admit that he was an extreme lightweight, when Nick went to get the next round of drinks and Louis only asked for a glass of water, not wanting to get too drunk just yet. Niall started laughing at Louis for getting water before managing to splutter out “oh yeah Louis is a proper lightweight.” Louis glared at Niall, not wanting Harry to think he was a child. Harry didn’t seem to mind before asking for a vodka and coke for himself as Nick walked to the bar. Harry turned to Niall and Louis and said “What do you think of Nick?” Nick leaned behind Harry and placed their drinks on the table before saying “Are you talking about me Haz?” Nick had a smile on his face however Louis thought that he saw something strange on bothHarry and Nick’s faces. However he didn’t mind, until later that is.

Harry and Nick had gone to the bathroom, and Louis was thinking that he like Nick, he is everything he thought he would be, and as Nick, Harry and Niall get progressively more drunk, Louis notices their personalities becoming more free and authentic , and Louis still can’t take his eyes off of Harry.

Niall has wandered off a while ago to find someone to dance with, and he left Louis slightly out of his comfort zone, yet as soon as Louis looks at Harry he immediately calms down. Nick drags Harry to the dance floor, whilst giggling and slurring in his ear, and Louis being Louis, followed. Then he realised what the look he saw on their faces were earlier. Nick was being pinned against a while as they were kissing, well what looked like sucking each others faces off, as Louis stood there just watching them, Louis could feel his heart pang at the thought of kissing a man that wasn’t him. However Louis perked up slightly as he suddenly realised what gender Harry was kissing. Louis insides weren’t just fluttering they were running and jumping and screaming in excitement until Louis stomach dropped. Gemma. Now Louis knew that him liking and still trying to be with Harry was a bad thing however Louis could only imagine what it would be like to be Gemma. However he still couldn’t tear his eyes away as Harry and Nick nearly ran out of the club, smiling and laughing with messy hair and swollen lips.

Louis started to question if Gemma knew what was happening, but the flat was empty when Louis was there, so surely she can’t know? Of course Louis didn’t even think that Harry and Gemma weren’t together. As Louis was going home in an uber alone, he was reflecting on everything he had found out today, and he felt like he was re-evaluating everything he had ever know about Harry Styles.

However, Louis still couldn’t take his mind off of Harry.

And Louis wished that the lips Harry had kissed tonight were his.


	4. four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi im so sorry i have not been updating ive been dealing with family issues. but im back! hopefully with the chapter you can see how the story will pan out and how the chapters will be Louis and Harrys different povs with the same events.
> 
> i was thinking of doing a song of the chapter and i'll probably make a playlist at some point.
> 
> the song of this chapter is "cigarette smoker fiona" - Arctic Monkeys
> 
> i imagine the club scene with this song especially
> 
> as always please do leave kudos and feedback anything is appreciated!
> 
> \- Charlie <3

When Harry woke up he felt like his head was being smashed in with a hammer, he groaned and stretched his arms above his head and when he finally opened his eyes, he realized that he wasn’t in his flat, and he looked to his right, and saw Nick sprawled out on his stomach. Harry tried to remember the previous nights events with Nick, however the alcohol induced haze prevented him from doing so. In some ways that was a good thing, it made all of Harry’s negative thoughts leave him, even if it was only because of the drugs and alcohol. Harry was sure that was a trade he could take. Nick slowly started to stir and mumbled a “good morning” into his pillow, Harry replied and went up to wander round Nicks house and make them both breakfast. He managed to find the ingredients for pancakes and slowly started making them as Nick started padding into the kitchen Nick wrapped his arms round Harrys torso. Harry tensed. Harry wasn’t sure what to do. However ten years of friendship made Nick realize that Harry didn’t want that and he patted his back and said “it’s okay Haz i get it.” Harry turned to Nick and smiled softly at him, Nick was probably his closest friend, and he felt lucky that Nick understood exactly how Harry felt. Harry placed a stack of pancakes in front of Nick, as they immediately slipped into their usual friendly banter of conversation. Harry and Nick spent the morning just lounging around as Harry didn’t have any classes at university. Later on they both decided that they wanted to go out again that night, and Harry thought of inviting Niall as the two had become fast friends since the café, the pair had just clicked. 

When Harry got back to his flat, it used to be his and Gemma's, but she had recently got a new boyfriend, and so she had moved out to live with him. He started having a conversation with Niall on the phone, when he remembered about the night out that he and Nick had planned, Niall said he would definitely be coming, and begged Harry to invite Louis which he reluctantly agreed to. He decided not to mention Nick, because as outgoing as he is on the radio, he can become an extremely shy person, unless he’s being very fake to someone, as Harry had noticed over the years. Niall asked where they were going and Harry replied “Oh shit yeah sorry mate, you know red star in central London?” Niall was speechless for the first time in his life. “You okay mate?” Harry asked. Niall spluttered “Yeah, how can you just plan a night out to red star?” Harry sighed “I know people.” Niall dropped it after that, and they went into a normal conversation until Niall said “Louis is pouting at me so I need to go” Harry laughed and said goodbye as he hung up the phone. 

Harry sighed as he was alone in his flat. Harry hated being alone . It’s when his thoughts ran wild in his head. He constantly surrounds himself with people and life so that his thoughts don’t control him. That is when Harry has the idea to invite everyone to his flat for pre drinks. They would need to all meet up so that Harry could let them all into the club anyway, so it was the perfect idea. Everyone could meet up before, and Harry wouldn’t be on his own for as long. 

Harry phoned Niall again and explained “I was wondering if you and Louis want to come over for pre’s at mine? I’ll invite everyone else but I don’t have Louis’ number” Niall said “Of course, what’s your address i’ll message Lou” “it’s flat 62 in 21 Ellis street and the post code is SW1 9AL” “Shit man are you loaded” Niall and Harry laughs “Nah I just split the rent with my sister, although she’s moving out so I’m looking for a new flat mate if you know anyone?” “Who’s your sister?” Niall asks “Also I’m looking for a flat, what’s the rent?” “Oh she’s Gemma you know the one in the band?” He heard Niall splutter, “And rents around £700 a month per person” “Hold on” Niall says “She’s your sister?” Niall questions. “Yeah why?” Harry asks, “everyone thinks you’re shagging or something” Harry laughs, “yeah it’s funny isn’t it” Harry sighs “So what do you think about that flat? you can come around now if you’re free?” Niall agreed instantly 

Within ten minutes, Niall was stood with wide eyes, looking like a puppy stood at Harry’s door. As Harry stepped aside and let Niall in, he immediately started bouncing around the flat. He had his mouth open as he looked around and was jumping around by the time he got to the kitchen. His face turned serious and he looked at Harry and said “Can you cook?” He nodded and Niall flung his arms around Harry and whispered “I would love to be your roommate.” Harry beamed, happy that the silence would finally be filled in the form of a bubbly blonde Irishman named Niall. He left after sorting out the rent, and Niall said that he would be back later for pre drinks. 

Harry could not have been happier that he had a new roommate, and that the void of silence that engulfed Harry when he was alone would be slightly lifted by Niall’s presence. Harry sighed in contentment at Niall as he was happy Niall had worked his way into Harry’s heart and he could tell Niall is a really good friend.

Harry checked the time and cursed under his breath, he needed to get dressed. He picked out a random outfit and quickly styled his hair before going into the kitchen and making the most alcoholic cocktail he could physically create. He took a sip and smirked at himself, he was going to get absolutely smashed, and he couldn't wait. He was pacing around his flat and straightening picture frames, making sure everything would be perfect. He rarely lets anyone come to his flat so to say that he was nervous was an understatement. 

He sighed as he heard a soft knocking at his door. He stood up and quickly checked his hair in the mirror as he walked past. He unlocked his door and plastered a smile on his face. It was Louis. Harry didn't know a lot about Louis. He was just Niall's friend as far as Harry was concerned. Louis was stood at Harrys' door, and Harry could see Louis checking him out, and he smirked to himself and Louis cheeks flushed pink, Harry could have fun with this. 

Harry showed Louis inside and he could see Louis internal conflict. Louis was easy to read. Harry stored that information for later. Louis finally took a breath and spoke to ask if he was the first person here. How oblivious was he? Harry forced a smile on his face as he replied and explained everything. When Harry mentioned Nick he noticed Louis tensing, and he tried not to make his blood boil, Nick was one of his best friends, why was Louis tensing? Harry then explained that Nick was really nice and he shouldn't be nervous, Louis blushed and looked down as they stood in tense and awkward silence. There was a knock at the door and Harry breathed a sigh of relief , he was hoping it was Nick, he was nicer than Harry and would know how to relieve the awkward tension. He walked to the front door, leaving Louis stood in the living room, his shoulders uncurled and he plastered a fresh fake smile on his face as he opened the door. Nick. Harry let a real smile overtake his features as Nick was stood at the door, Harry sighed "thank god you're here" Nick raised his eyebrow in a questioning manner. "There's Niall's friend here and he's just staring at me" Nick honked out a laugh and winked at Harry, "don't worry H I've got something to help." He pulled out a bag of white powder, Harry smiled, and Nick put it back in a pocket as they walked into his living room, where Louis was stood in the exact same position as when Harry had left the room to greet Nick. Nick introduced himself to Louis and vice versa as Harry went to answer the door to Niall. "Hey mate" Niall waltzed in almost claiming it as home already. Harry stopped him before he could enter the living room, Harry asked "Is Louis always this quiet, he's sort of just staring at me?" Niall laughed "He's shy but he's usually able to talk to people" Harry hummed, Louis was acting slightly strange. However Harry didn't dwell on it for too long, because honestly, Harry didn't care. He barely knew Louis, his life doesn't effect him. When he re-enters the room with Niall, Nick shoots him a look that shows his discomfort, Louis obviously isn't a huge talker. Harry goes into the kitchen and brings back the cocktails that he made earlier. He and Niall smirked at each other as they both clinked their glasses together. This would be fun. Harry, Nick and Niall have a lot more of the cocktails, he notices that Louis barely drinks any of his, and only sticks to the first one, but Harry doesn't care, because the laughter of Niall and Nick filled Harry's dark mind with fun and laughter, 

Harry called an uber and they all got in to go to the club, on the way there Harry's phone buzzed in his pocket. Zayn had texted him saying that he and Liam would not be coming tonight. That made Harry upset, when it was Nick, Harry and Zayn on a night out they were an unstoppable trio. However, Harry also knew that that over the past few weeks, Zayn and Liam had been getting really close and Zayn really likes Liam, which in return made him and Niall become closer after they had started "project Ziam" that one day in the café. Harry cant be mad at Zayn for spending time with the person he likes, so Harry just replies with a short "Have fun :) xx" and he puts his phone in his pocket because he knew that they would be at the club soon. 

Once they were at the club, Harry and Nick got out and led Niall and Louis to the front, where Harry and Nick greeted Paul, the bouncer, and when Harry hugged him. he slipped a small bag of pills into his pocket, and with that "payment" they were inside the club with nit another word to Paul as he patted them on the back, they were led in with no one even batting an eyelid. Nick and Harry gave each other a knowing look and smirked at each other. Harry then remembers the text he got from Zayn, and as they were walking to Harry and Nick's usual table he leaned in to Niall and Louis and said "Liam and Zayn said they cant come tonight" Louis nodded, not being in on the "mission" Harry and Niall had created. They both gave each other a knowing smile. They arrived at their table, and someone bought over vodka shots. Harry looked up and saw someone familiar, he smiled at them as they passed, when he looked back as he was ready to take his shot, he saw Louis blushing. Did he think he was smiling at him? Harry just shrugged it off. They smashed their glasses together and knocked them back Harry not even wincing as it goes down, after doing it for so long, Harry barely even feels the burn. When Nick asks everyone for their next drinks orders Louis asked for a glass of water, Harry had to try and not roll his eyes, out of the corner of his eye he could see Nick actually roll his eyes, and Harry bit back a laugh at his antics.

When Nick returned with the drinks and patter Harry on the back as he placed them on the table. Harry knew what this meant. Harry always knew what Nick meant. If that was a blessing or a curse, Harry wasn't sure, Nick went to the toilet and Harry stayed for a few minutes to make sure that no one followed Nick, and then shortly after, Harry followed Nick into the toilets making sure that he locked the door behind him, they could not have anither incident with the paparazzi walked in, that took a lot of bribery. When Harry walked in to the bathroom he saw that Nick had already separated the cocaine into lines on the counter. Harry smirked. He took out a five pound note and rolled it up. He stood beside Nick, they smirked at each other and in perfect synchronization they leaned down and snorted their lines. Harry's black pupils ensnared the green ring that wrapped around them. Capturing and trapping them as the drugs whirred around his system before finally settling in his brain, as the familiar buzz is ignited around his body. He looks at Nick and they both burst out laughing at nothing. Maybe Harry will be able to stand Louis silence now. Harry hates silence and now the constant drum of his heart in his ears blocked out the silence. And his thoughts. It was a few hours later when Harry and Nick were on the dance floor. When Harry knew what was going to happen next. Nick kissed Harry. Harry was prepared for it. and immediately pressed Nick against a wall the music fading out in the background, it was just him and Nick having fun, This was the silence Harry could stand. When time stopped and Harry just felt that moment where his brain shut off, and it was just him and Nick. If it was the drugs or the alcohol that made Harry want to hook up with Nick, he wasn't sure, but when he whispered in Nick's ear "Should we get out of here?" and Nick giggled in response, Harry knew that he would regret it in the morning, but he didn't care. He was living in the moment. As he dragged Nick out of the club, he didn't see the hurt expression on Louis face, would it have mattered? I guess we'll never know. 


End file.
